I signed up for a course in the upcoming fall. And was really looking forward to it… until last night. I received a friendly phone call from someone who introduced herself as an assistant. Here is how it went:
A: Elena?
E: Yes…
A: I am calling from the Viapassana Retreat Center about your registration
E: Oh yeah.. sure…how are you?
A: Great. Thanks. Well, we just wanted to follow up with you on your registration. However, I need to inform you that you are only allowed to take one course, in case you ever wanted to continue.
E: Ok, no problem, I wasn’t thinking yet about taking any follow up courses. But let me ask you, even if I did, what’s reason for not being permitted to take follow-ups?
A: Ahh…. Well, Ahmmm. We understand you are practitioner of hypnosis and NLP. We have a policy that anyone who practices that can not take any more of the follow up courses with us.
E. Why not?
A: Because the techniques are different and you can not combine vipassana and hypnosis.
E: This doesn’t make sense to me. I am not combining anything. I just decided to study vipassana and I happen to be a hypnotist. It has nothing to do with techniques.
A: I understand, but hypnosis and vipassana are two completely different things and you are not allowed to take more courses in vipassana.
E: It seems like a discrimination to me. You are discriminating against me because of the work that I do. First of all hypnosis is not religion, it is just an every day phenomenon that is actually all around us.
A: Sorry, these are the guidelines and I am just an assistant and I need to follow them. Do you still want to take the course?

This is how it went. It went awry. I really find it strange to discriminate against people from taking the course only because of what they do for a living. I am baffled…. Anyone have any idea what happened here?

I am not taking the course, by the way. I feel unwelcome there and I find them ridiculously contradicting and making no sense whatsoever.

Over the last few weeks I have experimented with Buddhist meditation at the Shambala Center in NY. They host open house mediation followed by a lecture every Tuesday from 7 pm – 9 pm.  There are some highlights of these mediation and lectures I would like to share.

I am not a Budhist, but I have always been a fan of some of the Buddhist philosophy, especially when they say something like “ we are non-theists” “ you don’t need to think of any supernatural being out there” or even something like “ life is suffering”,   – all that just really speaks the truth and detracts from illusions and pseudo-scientific claims about what God is.  And life is suffering? Unfortunately, it can be sometimes, as much as it can be joy.  It seems as though we human beings pave the way out of boredom, seemingly unjust world, troubles and life challenges – it just can’t be perfect, as much we want it to be. Everybody has problems. It ain’t a simple world we all choose to be.

Drop the Story

The first Tuesday at Shambala. A 30 minute meditation followed by a lecture “The Open Heart to Path” by John Baker. As usual I thought it would all be the stuff I already know, a bunch of new age ideas that only seem to make sense when you speak about them and yet at the end of the day they are all just words… At least this was my initial critical thought as the lecture began.  And yet now, as I write, I contend the opposite, because it is the words and sentences that we have left in our heads at the end of the day, and it is up to us which words we choose to ruminate on or simply which words and phrases we choose to drop and not think.

These words and phrases  in NLP and hypnosis we refer to as beliefs. Beliefs are the smaller chunks of our beliefs systems. And finally those belief systems are the parts of the larger grids called models of the world. The more we believe them, the more they define our actions, choices we make and hence the life path we live.

In Buddhist lecture these words and phrases and beliefs were refereed to as stories. Indeed, don’t we all have stories we all believe in? Those maps we think are the territories?

At the end of the lecture the instructor talked about the importance of friendships and human relations and how it is important to have an open heart and honesty with people we relate to. Then there were a few questions from the audience. One young woman raised her hand and started talking about her two friends who she admires so much and how she wants to be just like them, because they seem to be so free and open and then she added, “ I wish I could be like them, but as a woman in this world sometimes you can’t say “No” so that makes me really constricted and not myself sometimes.”  The entire audience silently gasped. The lecturer looked at this woman in silence and said, “ See, this is the story you talk about being a woman who can’t say “no…” I am not telling you that you need to violate this story, but I suggest you look at it and be aware of it.” The guy next to me jokingly said that her statement makes him want to meet her. Ha, ha, funny. Poor woman.

Question is how do you drop stories? Or even more how do you detect and recognize these stories as actual stories? This is the hardest part, because when we think them, we usually believe them, which makes them part of our mental grids. The Buddhists usually offer mindful meditation, letting go of thoughts and becoming silent for extended amount of time, as if connecting with grand silence can create a better wider awareness and letting go of mind produced stories.

Sometimes, it is useful to step into “Meta” and imagine you are looking at yourself by describing your beliefs in third person “ She thinks and believes…”,  “ He thinks and believes..” This can help dissociate from oneself. Other times, it is useful to talk to friends and people you trust and love and simply share what’s on your mind. And alternatively you can always see a trained consulting hypnotist who can help you identify your limiting beliefs and “stories”, reframe them into new stories ( personal scripts) – those that leave you happy and content or empowered, after having been instilled in your unconscious mind through hypnosis.

       I called my best friend and told him about my dilemma. He told me to go to Harlem, find a store where they sell those voluptuous hats that black women always wear to churches. Luckily, I live in Harlem, so I didn’t have to go far! I went on the street and asked a few random women where I could find such store. After getting a few suggestions I headed to the hat store destination. I walked a few blocks to find the store was unfortunately closed. I worried more. Then suddenly as I turned to my right I saw a beautiful brown hat on a small table among many other goods a street vendor was selling. It was an elegant looking hat for the humble price of 20 dollars. There was one problem, the rim of the hat had a part  where the lining kind of got overlaid, creating a small messy spot. Well, you get what you pay for, I thought. I bought it. I had no choice. When I came home I took a thin yellow scarf and wrapped it around the head of the hat, tying a nice bow tie; which gently covered the knotty spot . I was all set for my first Polo event!

          The next day I saw so many glamorous good looking people and celebrities! His Highness Prince Harry stood right next to me when he was giving a speech about the  good causes of the charity event. It was a mixture of people with most amazing outfits, dresses and certainly very fashionable glamorous hats!

          My hat wasn’t perfect I knew it. My hat wasn’t overly expensive and glamorous, I knew that too. But, I tried not to think about it and rather enjoyed the Polo game, dinner, champagne, desserts and mingling with happy people all around.

          After the first part of the game, all the VIP’s were invited to come on to the field. My friend and I joined everyone on the grass. It was fun to stroll on the field and being a part of that special VIP world. It was different, yet it was the same.

         I turn around and next to me is  standing Gayle King (editor-at-large for O, The Oprah Magazine and the best friend of Oprah Winfrey ). She is smiling and shining brightly like a beam of light. She looks at us and says hello. We talk for a little bit, take pictures. She leaves and then turns back again and says to me “You got the right hat!”  This was by far the most exhilarating day  of the  year for me.

James Esdaile, a Scottish surgeon was one of the pioneers in using Hypnosis for pain control. Esdaile performed about 3000 painless surgeries while working in India. There is one twist though: at that time ( beginning of 19^th century) they weren’t using the word Hypnosis. The term Hypnosis was coined a little later in 1842 by another Scottish surgeon James Braid. Before that Hypnosis was known as…. Any guesses? Mesmerism, of course. This term originated with a well known Austrian physician and faithhealer Anton Mesmer. Just bear with me readers, don’t go away. Mesmerism is somewhat different from Hypnosis and yet very much the same. What was different about mesmerism, with which Esdale was able to perform so many painless surgeries? Mesmerism worked on the power of suggestion just like Hypnosis, however it worked because patients were lead to believe as if the doctor or a surgeon possessed some special power. That in turn would induce trance in patients.  Interestingly enough both Mesmer and Esdaile also believed in their special abilities to connect with some universal healing fluid. How entrancing!

Nowadays, of course we as hypnotists do not use any of these bogus stories to put our clients to trance. There are many inductions, breathing techniques, guided visualization and imagery that hypnotists use to achieve a receptive state of mind in a client. I think this is where the power of a good hypnotist lies: in the abilities to detect limiting beliefs, formulate proper suggestions and finally to induce trance to “install” these new suggestions in one’s  subconscious mind. In other words, clinical Hypnosis has nothing to do with any special mysterious or divine power of a Hypnotist. It is just a skill, which a good hypnotist acquires with practice and knowledge. By the way anyone could learn that, it just takes years of studying and practicing.

I use Hypnosis and NLP when I work with clients to help them stop stop addictions, with success motivation, weight loss and more. Most of the time, especially with smokers, you don’t need deep levels of trance,like theta or delta ( there are four known levels: beta-wake state,alpha- heightened state of focus, theta- trance state and delta- deep trance, coma).

When working with pain management I found that inducing deeper levels of trance (theta) and lingering there a bit longer  would really benefit the reduction of pain much more. While in those states I would usually guide clients into visualization of various metaphoric healing images (like strings, or cleansing water, or beams of light). Throughout this long lasting pleasant trance I would  give them very positive suggestions and sometimes very specific instructions to remove triggers and associations with pain.

So, what exactly is so powerful about these long lasting trance states?  I will chat about that in my next post. In the meantime, I welcome any questions or comments here.

For more information visit www.insidehypnosis.com